The music fills an ocean silently

On Friday our family went to a funeral. He was 90 years old, and had been in hospice for a week or so before he died. The service was held at the cemetery, with the interment immediately following. 30 years ago we buried my grandmother next to my grandfather in that same cemetery.

Newhouse Grave Marker

I’m not sure if I had been back to see the grave site since that day. We took advantage of the time to show our daughters a little bit of their heritage.

The Lord gave…

A week and a half earlier my brother-in-law’s third child was born. Like the others, he arrived about 5 weeks early. After spending 10 days in Newborn Intensive Care, he had been sent home the day before. We didn’t know that he was home, but were in the neighborhood, so we stopped by, hoping to let the girls see their cousin for the first time.

small hand grasping an adult finger

He was tiny and fragile, but seemed to be doing well. He even nursed while we were there. We took quite a few pictures and some video, but didn’t want to stay too long, as they had been through a gruelling week and a half and needed rest.

And the Lord has taken away…

Monday morning we received a call from my brother-in-law. Before he left for work, he went in to say goodbye to his newborn son, and found him cold. He had just nursed two hours earlier, and now he was gone. Exactly two weeks old.

We all cried. A lot. And the tears still come, often unexpectedly. There are still a lot of unanswered questions as we all work through this in our own ways.

Blessed be the name of the Lord

Sometimes when you look at what life gives you, you realize it is not life, but God. The blessings flow fully and frequently. It is easy to say “God is good.”

Sometimes when you look, all you see is emptiness. A great big huge emptiness. And what you see at the end of that emptiness will determine the course that the rest of your life will take.

Whether you choose to see it or not, God is at the end of the emptiness. It’s hard for us to see Him there, because he is also at the beginning of it, and all through it. He’s greater than any void, and longs to fill it.

When I look, all I can see is God. Because He is the answer to all those questions.

Job 1:21


“When You speak to me
When I take the time to listen
There is more than what I think I feel
When You speak to me
When I sit and still the motion
There is nothing left but what is real
There is an answer to every question
The answer is You

“And the heavens open when You speak to me
Pouring light into my waiting heart
And the music fills an ocean silently, quietly
When you speak to me

“When You speak to me
When You call me and surround me
There is peace to cover any pain
When You speak to me
When You place Your word inside me
I am filled and I am strong again
There is a reason for every longing
The reason is You”

When You Speak to Me, Twila Paris


My deepest condolences go out to you and your family.

Thank you for the courage to share with us this most personal and vulnerable moment.

Posted by: CM Harrington on September 8, 2004 02:34 PM

I send you our deepest symphaties on behalf of our families. Being willing to share this with us tells a lot about yourself. Why some get to live so long and why others are born just to die is one of those things beyond our finite human comprehension.

Posted by: beto on September 8, 2004 03:39 PM

Two weeks of love and kisses and holding close is a blessing, now bitter sweet. I’m glad he got to come home before he was called home.

Posted by: Dan on September 10, 2004 08:04 AM

My deepest condolences to you and your family.

Posted by: Event Horizon on September 12, 2004 11:31 PM

Thank you for your kind words, thoughts and prayers. They were and are greatly appreciated.

Posted by: Mark Newhouse on September 21, 2004 03:00 PM

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In which Mark deals with death...

September 8, 2004 | family

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